Time for a reprise of John Phillips. I do enjoy his political poems. As Trump, Johnson and Bolsonaro continue to make a cock-up I think it’s always good to understand that they promise the earth and deliver sod all – particularly Tories and Republicans.
The Ballad of Dodgy Dave
When Cameron was Prime Minister
That’s when it all began.
He thought he could do anything;
He was that kind of man.
The Tories thought him wonderful,
Their fortunes, he could save;
Whilst Labour sought to bring him down
And called him Dodgy Dave.
When faced with an election
He laid a cunning plan.
He’d hold a referendum
And win himself some fans.
Right-wingers were a problem;
They hated the E.U.
He’d give them rope to hang themselves;
That’s what he planned to do.
He launched his manifesto;
The promises ran free.
They won him the election,
By stealth and bribery.
But Dodgy Dave could not evade
The meaning of his words.
The date was set, the promise met
In manner most absurd.
Then politicians on both sides
Campaigned with all their might
Without regard for truth or lies
Or what was wrong or right.
Now Dave was feeling confident
When voting day arrived.
With all his usual arrogance,
Opponents he decried.
But when the votes were counted,
The answer loud and clear;
That Dodgy Dave had lost the game
And ruined his career.
So Dodgy David Cameron,
He did n’t even try
To sort the awful mess he’d made;
He simply waved goodbye.
Now Dodgy Dave is past and gone,
A pawn of history.
The Man Who Ruined Britain,
Will be his legacy.
The moral of this story
Is painful, stark and clear.
Don’t ever trust a Tory,
It’ll all-ways end in tears.
From the book ‘Shorts and Shots’ by John Phillips.
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