Roy had become my Sal Paradise – the frenzied maniac who recklessly spent his life careering through experience after experience. I had got to know him and become friends. The more I found out about the life he had led the more I was impressed. He’d lived the wild free existence of the Kerouac dream.
And I had this dream in here same time as standing awake
These various visions rushed through as I giggled and quaked
The distant guns thunder my end and I duck for a while
Auntie Lily is handing me candy she chuckles I smile
And our village is where I was born and it’s where I will die
And I’ll never be able to leave it whatever I try
The ebb and the flow of the forces of life pass me by
Which is all that I’ll know from my birth to my last gasping sigh
And O how the sea she roars with laughter
And howls with the dancing wind
To see the dying lying there obeying
All we have is this short life. We fill it with what we want and are gone. We see it there before us and we see death looming at the end of the journey.
In the face of that we carry on as if it will last forever and distract ourselves from reality. We play the game of politeness and trivia.
We are all born into this society and there really is no escape whatever we do. We’re in it. It shapes us, controls us and bends us to its purpose. There is no escape. We will die within it. Out protest is pitiful.
The way we live our lives apart from nature, spending so much of our time in work, unable to appreciate the world, the universe, poetry, art, music, is a great shame. Those more primitive people had it right – the community got together and enjoyed themselves, shared and experienced. We’ve lost that connection.
A lifetime in servitude and then we are gone and the wind laughs at us as it scatters our atoms.
My age and my time
The blood fire wine and rhyme
That fills my dream reminds me of an atom in a bubble on a wave
That held its breath for one sweet second then was popped and disappeared
Into fruitful futilities meaningless meaning
Meaningless meaning
All the fury of our lives, everything we do, achieve, experience and feel is a fleeting instant in the eternity of time.
Our life is a fruitful futility full of meaningless meaning. Best get on with it then and make sure we live it to the max and fill it with love, creativity and make our own meaning.
