A bit of levity, fun and jokes.

A bit of levity, fun and jokes

More great funnies from Raili! These certainly made me laugh!

soulgifts – Telling Tales

 

He’s a cheat

My husband is a liar and a cheat.  He has cheated on me from the beginning and when I confront him, he denies everything.  What’s worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It’s so humiliating.  Also, since he lost his job 14 years ago, he hasn’t even looked for a new one.  All he does all day is smoke cigars, play golf, cruise around and shoot ball with his buddies, while I work so hard to pay our bills.  Since our daughter went away to college and then got married, he doesn’t even pretend to like me, and hints that I may be a lesbian.  What should I do?

Signed:
Confused

Answer..

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Bill Hicks Quotes

Bill Hicks Quotes

Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves.
That is a great idea, isn’t it? We’ll wake up soon as someone else.
I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out.
I don’t often feel like that but sometimes, when I look at what we are doing to the world, the cruelty, thoughtlessness, selfishness and greed, I get to feel angry and sad.
Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye.
It destroys our creativity!
We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.
If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.
I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.
Me too.
It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.
Why is it that we get pleasure out of other peoples’ pain?
Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children.
They have it easy!
I live in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.
That’s a bit like Steinbeck, isn’t it – the words of Tom Joad

John Cooper Clarke Quotes – The Punk Poet speaks!

John Cooper Clarke Quotes – The Punk Poet speaks!

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Nobody has quite the mouth that Dr John has. It’s an incessant stream that can bring tears. Here’s a few:

You can count on him. He’ll always let you down.

So many people that is true of.

Poverty – the one thing money can’t buy

To convey one’s mood
in seventeen syllables
is very diffic

As they used to say on Stingray, ‘Anything can happen in the next half hour’. I’ve always tried to live with that thought in mind.

With charm you’ve got to get up close to see it; style slaps you in the face.

Increasingly, I have to deal with bereavement. I could go to five funerals a week. But that many vol au vents is not good for you.

The Wine Wankers – cartoons

A collection of fun wine images

After the success of our “Wine… It pairs perfectly with Christmas” post that was full of fun Christmas wine related images (in which you can have a look at by clicking here), I thought I’d share another lot of the fun wine related images that have come through our Twitter and Facebook feeds.

I wish I could credit the brilliant minds behind these but unless it’s on the image that important fact has been lost through time.

Enjoy!

a-funny-cat-glass-wine-bottle

a_LemonSqueezy_WineFlu_P

a-bidcabsav

somee-winemuga-Bring-Wine a-DungBeetles a-easy-choice-winery-realist-1-800x416 afrencharmyknife  a-Half_Full_Empty_Quote_Wine a-hard-worka_hotdog a-merlot-little anotsureabout

at-my-age a-very-funny-pics-health-and-beauty-wine-shelves a-wine-aerobics-stu a-wine-aerobocs-purple awinechair a-wine-dandya-wine-dog-lips awinefixed a-wine-flowchart a-wine-newyears-corks a-wine-say-when awinetaster

Opher interviews Opher again!

Opher interviews Opher again!

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‘So tell me Opher – why do you insist on optimism for the future in the face of such a hopeless greed-ridden, power-mad establishment?’

‘Because I believe that most people are intrinsically good. Eventually the good will win.’

‘But that goes in the face of reason. All the power lies with the greedy ones. You aren’t going to change them.’

‘Yes we will. We will because there are billions of us who crave for fairness, justice and tolerance. We have just become connected through the internet. We can shine a light on the disgusting things they are doing. We can broadcast it and make billions of people aware. We can unify and organise. That’s democracy. The power of the many to do good.’

‘What if they do good? What if they are cruel, mean and nasty?’

‘I believe that on that first primeval beach, when we crawled up that shore we either gave each other a helping fin or we crawled over each other. I believe we held out a fin. That’s our strength – teamwork.’

‘That’s just wishful thinking.’

‘Yes. But it’s based on my own experience. It’s only a minority of people who do all the nasty stuff. Most people would give you help if you needed it. Human nature has a pleasant altruistic side. I put my faith in humanity and education.’

‘So what is the biggest problem we have to solve?’

‘The problems are so interwoven that they are almost impossible to untangle. Whether it’s war, poverty, corporate greed, pollution, climate change or the devastation of the natural environment and slaughter of all the wild creatures. It all has the same roots. For me the biggest and most pressing problem is population control. We have to reduce our numbers to a sustainable level. But in practice we have to address them all at the same time.’

‘And you think that is possible?’

‘Oh yes! Cooperation, unity, and a collective will. We have the science, technology and means to solve all of those problems. We just need equality, stability, unity and the will to address it.’

‘You’ll never get it!’

‘Oh yes we will! Oh yes we will! Because we have to or human beings don’t have a future. Together we can win! Of that I am sure.’

About Opher’s World.

About Opher’s World.

About Opher’s World

I live to make the world a better place. Why don’t you join me? Creativity gives a purpose to life. This blog celebrates creativity. I welcome you. Please have a look at my books, art, poems and views.

This is an idealist’s shriek at the absurd, the horrendous and the obscene in the huge optimism that we can make it better.

This is a blog in pursuit of the marvellous.

I ask you to devour all that is wonderful –

and detest all that is cruel, vicious and mean.

I want to build a positive Zeitgeist!

A limerick for Johnson.

There was a public school matron
Who had Johnson for a patron
She fed him with pies
And in front of her eyes
He buggered the fate of our nation.

It was Dave Kingsbury who set me off writing limericks. I suggested that Johnson was a caricature of Billy Bunter.

These devious public school Bullingdon boys – like Cameron, Osborne and Johnson – come from privileged backgrounds, think they can do anything they want, cream off huge wealth for themselves and their chums, and are completely destroying the country in the process.

‘We’re all in it together’ they chortle as they stash millions away in the bank! While the rest of us suffer a generation of austerity!

Cameron and Osborne’s inept Brexit referendum has ruined the country. It has cost us countless billions, divided the nation in hatred, caused a huge rise in hate crime, knife crime and violence, and will affect the whole future of the nation.

Johnson is an inept blustering buffoon who is every bit as bad a Trump.