Chapter 26 – Dealing with bullying
As a child I rapidly gravitated towards the back of the classroom where I decided I might attract less attention.
During one maths lesson I discovered I had made an error when doing a sum. I had taken to doing things in pencil so that I could correct mistakes. Unfortunately I had forgotten my rubber. I knew the boy behind had a rubber and turned round to borrow it. Silently I picked it up and mouthed ‘can I borrow this?’ holding it up.
He nodded.
I turned back to address the mistake on my book when a wooden blackboard rubber hit me right between the eyes and knocked me flying out of my seat.
Mr W had seen me turn round and flung the wooden blackboard rubber at me. His years of rugby must have given him unerring aim. He got me dead centre in the middle of the forehead.
I was unconscious for ten minutes while he continued with the lesson. Nobody was allowed near me.
When I came round I was obviously concussed. I did not know where I was or what I was doing. My best mate had to guide me round the school for the rest of the day. I was in a complete haze.
A huge lump had shot up on my forehead. It was so large I could actually see it.
When I got home my Mum was appalled but my Dad just said I must have deserved it.
Nothing happened. They never even went in to complain.
Within any classroom there is a pecking order. Boys compete with each other to be top dog. It is biological. The top dog produces different pheromones that make them more attractive to females.
The hierarchy is established through aggression, humour, physical prowess, looks, fashion and verbal dexterity. The relationships are constantly reinforced. Those of similar status vie with each other for position and those at the bottom are the butt of everyone’s put-downs. That is the game.
It can manifest itself in schools as bad behaviour, attention seeking and showing off in the classroom. This is often hard to deal with. Punishments are water off a duck’s back and often seen as a badge of honour. It is amazing how an attitude can change when you take them out of the classroom, deprive them of an audience, and deal with them as an individual.
The other manifestation is bullying. This can take the form of verbal, physical or internet bullying.
Bullying occurs everywhere. There is no institution without it. It has to be dealt with.
The first way is to provide good mechanisms for prevention and reporting:
- A high profile ‘Bully Box’ for anonymous complaints that is regularly emptied and all inputs processed fully
- Explaining clearly what constitutes bullying and what action will be taken
- Working throughout the school to raise sensibilities, promote empathy and the need to respect all people
- Celebrating difference and promoting responsible behaviour
- Having poster campaigns and assemblies
- Having a zero tolerance of all negative attitudes towards minority groups
- Using ‘Student Voice’ to set a tone
- Opening avenues of communication involving parents, students, all teaching and non-teaching staff, form tutors and heads of year
- Having clear well publicised procedures for reporting bullying (putting letters in the box, telling friends, parents, tutors, teachers, head of year, deputy or Head
- Instilling the facts in all staff, students, and parents that it is serious and even lesser examples need talking seriously and dealing with. Ensuring they give it priority over everything else
- Dealing with small examples so that they do not grow into bigger problems
- Processing all bullying incidents through restorative practice. Gathering all the people involved together. Talking the whole thing through. Agreeing culpability and degree of culpability and getting all involved to agree the punishment for their actions
- Checking with students through anonymous surveys.
- Being constantly vigilant
No school completely eradicates bullying but I am proud that my school had extremely low levels. Students reported feeling comfortable and said that the school was friendly and supported those students who were geekie, different or odd. Those individuals felt secure. Racism, homophobia, sexism and negative attitudes towards other minorities were at an all time low.
That is quite an achievement and one of my greatest.
A previous Head Mike Day told me a heart-warming story. During the eighties he worked hard to counteract the high level of violence, endemic bullying and the elitist system that produced these things.
He did away with streaming and set up mechanisms to deal with all the problems.
He had been there a year and transformed the school. An anonymous note was pushed under his door thanking him for what he had done. The lad wrote that for the first time in his life he felt safe walking around the school.
