Relationships are like sticks.

My good friend Tess said this on the subject of relationships:


Relationships are like sticks.

You enter the wood and find a nice stick. You pick it up and walk with it a while.

Then you spy another stick that looks better than the one you have.

You throw your stick away and walk with the new stick.

A while later you see another stick that looks better than the one you have.

And so it goes on.

There is always a better stick than the one you have.

You discard and pick up in search of the perfect stick.

Then you look up and find you are coming to the end of the wood

And you do not have a stick.

Suddenly any stick will do.

35 thoughts on “Relationships are like sticks.

  1. Namaste Opher 🙂

    A fine poem: an insightful observation. I imagine at some point we are all guilty to some degree of swopping sticks, however, true friendships are never compromised whilst we endeavour through the forest of life to discover our relationship, our niche, in this wonderful world. We may often part-company from relationships but to those we regularly turn, these are our truths, the pillars upholding our temple.

    The building in which I live has had a new coat of paint: a whole new colour in fact. No longer sky-blue it has become gun-metal grey and cream. I’m not certain about it at all and will have to form a new relationship with it all over again. Perhaps it is a sign of something or another. A moment to pause at crossroads.

    Have a great day. Thanks for sharing this insightful poem 🙂

    Love ad be Loved. Namaste 🙂


      1. I much preferred the sky-blue and feel identity has been removed from the building. It’s quite sombre now, whilst over the road a sprawling Victorian house built in dark stone adds to the bleak landscape: it is reminiscent of Dartmoor prison lol 🙂

        Sky-blue was unbounded,
        But now I feel grounded,
        Bounded by grey paint and cream,
        Tis not the building I once lived in,
        Whose heart was evergreen.
        That building is gone:
        It’s memory lives on,
        As too its photogenic appeal.
        But sorry to say upon this day,

      1. In gold I hope Opher! 😀

        For years the building had been blue becoming something of a landmark. But all things change and I imagine they change when the time is right to do so. Perhaps when completed I will find reason to bond but until then I’m reserving final judgement.

        Best wishes for the week ahead! May it be fruitful in all ways.

        Be lucky! Namaste 🙂


      2. Hey Opher, Namaste 🙂

        Hmm. All but my initial responses on people’s blog-sites today have seemingly gone astray. One wonders if it is deliberate and intentional or WP just being temperamental. Oh by the way, the fly in the sky with the telescopic eye is back again buzzing about in the dark.

        Gold, Gold, Gold indeed! The auriferous stuff the very best dreams are always made of 😀

        Thank you, I have hope for a good week: for positive outcomes to existing concerns and solutions if otherwise. It is a very sorry state of affairs: pun intended lol 🙂

        Have a great week, take care,
        Smile like you’re a billionaire!
        happy writing!

        Love and be Loved. Namaste 🙂


  2. Sticks For Sale! Get your sticks here!
    Opher, I think your friend needs help. She’s been psychologically damaged and in a state of depression to such an extent that physical objects have taken on a lifeform or at least represent such. This really is total lunacy.

      1. Oh I got it all right and doesn’t she have a very low tolerance level / attention span regards close relationships with others. Only somebody with that sort of problem could come up with that point of view in the first place. Someone with a healthy and successful long-term relationship wouldn’t come up with this sort of stuff as there wouldn’t be any reason to do so. She has been damaged. Didn’t you get that then?

      2. Sorry – wrong again. She has a very long-term relationship that has lasted 40 years plus. You’re not good on humour are you?

      3. Oh I see, she’s taking the piss as you are too, on an issue which is the scourge of society and directly or indirectly responsible for a lot of children’s misery and to some extent for a lot of the youth crime that’s killing and maiming people every day and a feature of our daily news broadcasts. In some London boroughs with a predominant Afro-Caribbean population, only 45% of households have a father figure due to relationship turmoil.
        Over 40,000 children, victims of marital breakdowns are now housed in children’s homes or with temporary support foster parents.
        The collateral damage is considerable.
        Yet you as a former head teacher (I believe) find time to sneer and ridicule?
        Oh I get it all right.
        It’s all right for you, because you already knew what the substance was of this friend’s sarcasm, but as a “not in the joke loop person” reading this in the cold light of day and with an full and active understanding of the connotations of such, it’s spells a different sentence entirely.
        Well done, had me well fooled.

      4. Relationships the scourge of society? Really?
        A light-hearted look at the reality of forming relationships into that diatribe??

      5. No, the fall out from relationship breakdowns. What part of that can’t you understand?
        Are you completely cut off from the main topics of the day or something? How can you have avoided all the debates on TV and radio and numerous press articles on this matter. I thought this was further comment on all of that.
        Yes, matey, relationship breakdowns are directly or indirectly responsible for the current scourge of our society – I use “our” loosely as I’m not quite sure how deep that hole is that you’ve buried yourself in to have missed completely the #1 topic debate as discussion today, last week, last month, next week and next month.
        No matter, as you were.

      6. No Matthew – what part do you not understand?
        That is not what it is about at all. That is your interpretation.
        When one is young and a teenager one forms a number of relationships. One goes out with a number of partners looking for a lifetime partner. That is what this refers to. Not the break up of marriages. This was advice to a son.
        It is actually moral. It warns of the dangers of serial relationships and points to the preference for one. It is not good to discard sticks in search of the perfect stick.

    1. You’ve had 24 hours to invent that last piece of made-up nonsense. Fail.
      Does a teenager really do that? What sort of one, a gypsy or a member of the Amish perhaps? I’d think the last thing on any teenager’s mind would be looking for that “lifetime partner” whilst being a teenager. We don’t live in the 17th century anymore.
      Let me just ask one of mine …. nope, definitely not, not even close. She thinks you’re bonkers. Oh, here’s the other back earlier and in time for dinner at 7pm for once. Let me ask him… another negative and he’s looking at at me like I’ve completely lost it.
      So there you have it, a negative.
      I’ve just asked them if they intend to form a number of relationships in pursuit of this lifetime partner and can’t get an answer for the howls of derision.
      Result, a double-negative.
      There both sitting smirking waiting for the next stupid question. Luckily there isn’t one to ask.
      They have both requested that if I have intentions of giving relationship advice in the future (which I would be a pains to do as neither are stupid or need coaching in this department) could I refrain from using inanimate objects as tools for explanatory examples. That’s probably the best advise either of us have seen on this page.

      1. Wife’s just commented that this reminds her of when she was fifteen and her dad asked her if she knew about “the birds and the bees”, (as it’s certainly on the same intellectual level of the sticks story) and replied “dad, they taught us that when I was eleven, but I’ve known about it since I was eight”. We should never patronise our children.

      2. It’s just a difference of the levels of maturity in thought. I do get that. And yes, let’s move on. But thanks for at least observing my comments and may I suggest for the benefit of those readers that aren’t from the Rainbow-Sunshiny-Hippydom brigade that you include such information in the introduction – this is the advice my friend gave to her teenage son etc. As you were.

    1. Thanks Tyler – good to hear from you. Tess is a great name isn’t it? Good luck with your relationship. Good sticks are hard to come by.

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