How? Why? What? And Who?
I am always intrigued by the workings of my mind – where do the thoughts originate? How do words form in my head and find their way to my tongue? I am always afraid that when I speak publically the words will cease to present themselves, my head will be empty, and I will dry up.
It is a process that I am not in control of.
I do not like not being in control of it. Yet it usually seems to work very well. It is only the fear that holds me back.
I am also intrigued by the idea of personality. Is there something intrinsic to each one of us? Or are we nothing more that the products of our culture, upbringing and experience? What is the essence of ourselves?
What is it that makes me hold back from joining in with this society? Why do I not wish to fit in? Life would be easy. It can be easier if you conform. Yet I find myself questioning the morality and motives of our leaders. I do not trust them. I do not wish to be part of this machine of modern society. I do not trust this relentless progress towards apocalypse.
I hold a lot of things dear. I do not know why I have a leaning towards those values, attitudes and feelings. I find many experiences pleasurable and get intensely upset by other things. Why do I find the destruction of the natural environment and slaughter of our wild-life so distressing? Why are so many others quite happy to inflict pain on animals and gain immense pleasure out of doing so?
Something has made me care and others not.
Something has made me wish to do something about injustice while others merely seek to exploit any weakness for their own gain.
I am the person I am. I do not know how I became that person. Was it genetic? Or was it the life I have led?
I live. I dream. I try. I die.
How? Why? What? And Who?
How do I think?
How do I speak?
Where do the words originate
From those I choose to seek?
Why do I question?
Why do I try?
Why do I believe
The whole world
Is one big lie?
What gives me pleasure?
What causes pain?
What makes some men
Live for nothing more
Than selfish gain?
Who is this person?
That I think of as I?
What makes me tick?
And when will I die?
Opher 29.1.2016
If you enjoy my poems or anecdotes why not purchase a paperback of anecdotes for £7.25 or a kindle version for free.
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