For a bit of a laugh I thought I’d play about.
Blowin’ the Wind
How many beers can one man drink
Before he falls on the ground?
How many shorts can one man down
Before his head goes round and round
The answer my friend is urine down the drain
The answer is messin’ up my brain.
Yes ‘n’ how many pies can one man eat
Before he’s as large as my Nan?
On how many couches must one man laze
Before he’s as big as a van?
The answer my friend is growing whim by whim
The answer is never getting slim.
Yes ‘n’ how many knees must one MP touch
Before he finally gets sacked?
‘n’ how many massages can a film producer demand
Before he gets his face slapped?
The answer my friend is bouncing in the bed
The answer is hormones in the head
Yes ‘n’ how many breasts can one surgeon enlarge
Before he can buy a new yacht?
‘n’ how many noses can another doctor fix
Before he’s got more than we’ve all got?
The answer my friend is bobbing in the bra
The answer is banking offshore
Yes ‘n’ how many teeth must a pop star possess
Before he wins X factor?
‘n’ how many squeals must be squealed every night
Before they crown him a star?
The answer my friend is wriggling on the screens
The answer is churning up the teens
Yes ‘n’ how many nights can strictly carry on
Before I get my TV back?
‘n’ how long do they have to bloody pause
Before they deliver the sack?
The answer my friend is ratings in the bank
The answer is nowt but hanky pank.