The Corona Diaries – Day 600

Bloody Hell!! Six hundred days of things being weird!! It’s long become the norm. I’ve forgotten how carefree we used to be. That’s strange because in the past we’ve probably gone abroad into places where there were diseases that were much nastier than covid without thinking about them at all!!

Such is the power of the media.

It’s a couple of days now since I had my booster jab. The soreness in my arm has completely worn off (not that it was that bad in the first place) and, apart from Bill Gates keep whispering in my ear I feel completely as normal as ever I was.

No folks – the vaccine is not poison you are injecting into yourself. It’s pieces of mRNA that stimulate the production of your own body’s immune system. By now all that mRNA will have completely gone. My body is starting to produce natural antibodies to neutralise any covid virus that tries to get into my body. All natural stuff. It’s all my own immune system – no lingering shit. Forget your fake news and scare stories.

This morning I took a walk up my hill. It was a grey day but not too cold. A lot of leaves have dropped but those remaining on the trees looked great. There were all shades of yellow, orange and yellow. It just needed some sunshine to make them look magnificent. Unfortunately I didn’t get any.

On the way up the hill I spotted a kestrel sitting in her place on the telephone wire watching me intently. As I approached she flew off over my head. A magnificent bird. At the top of the hill the crows were kicking up a racket in the trees. Something had disturbed them I looked around for a kite but I couldn’t see one. There were a couple of fabulous pheasant strutting across the freshly seeded field. Loads of red berries on the Hawthorne. It didn’t feel like mid-November. This global warming is having an effect. Round about Guy Fawkes day it usually goes very dank, cold and wet. This felt more like October. There was a light mist but none of that dreary dank feel.

Meanwhile, out in Coronaland, the pathetic, self-serving government has its dank, clammy fingers in our wallets. Instead of the £350 million a week promised from Brexit they are extracting that and more out of our pockets through tax and national insurance. Snidey bastards. They’ve been messing up the covid response, handing out cash to their donors through dodgy contracts, messing up big time with Brexit and now we are picking up the tab.

What a bunch of con artists and liars.

So much for sunny uplands!! This is another decade of austerity.

Also, so much for Levelling up!! I see they’ve pulled all the High Speed trains for the North!! It seems we peasants can do without. It was all guff and lies.

But we knew that, didn’t we??

In order to get on in this country you have to be a Tory donor. It’s like the Masons.

So yesterday in Coronaland there were 39,705 new cases but just 63 deaths. But it seems that storm clouds are gathering. Europe is locking down as another wave is coming through. But we are staunch. We don’t care about death. This is Britain. We have Dunkirk spirit. We can suffer the slings and arrows of the blitz of covid. Except we’re allergic to ventilators!!

Boris Johnson says that there’s no need for Plan B to be implemented. Probably because he doesn’t know what Plan B is. He says we’ll be alright and Christmas is safe!! So we’re in big trouble aren’t we?? Whatever that bumbling idiot says is a lie!

A million 12-15 year-olds have now been jabbed. They are helping keep all of us safe!! Good on them. That’s pure altruism. Covid doesn’t affect them too much.

So now we’re offering booster jabs to the over-40s. We’ve been warned that it’s either be jabbed or face restrictions. If you’re unjabbed stay at home. You’re a spreader.

They are altering the covid passports to add the boosters!!

Stay safe!!! Get your covid booster surfboard out! We’ll surf the wave with confidence!!

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