Reflections from a ditch – A novel

This novel is part biographical. It is based around a journey I used to make every day as I went into work. I used to drive down country lanes. The sights and events all happened. The crash didn’t – at least not that one!

I wanted a framework to hang a lot of thoughts around. My protagonist is basically me. He/Me is trapped in an upside down car in a ditch, badly injured and slowly dying. His/My head is full of random thoughts and memories as consciousness ebbs.

Reflections from a ditch – the blurb.

Sex, death, awe, wonder, fury, birth, life, beauty, politics, religion, anger, nature, love, questions, stories and thoughts are all words. I had to rearrange their meanings.
You live your life and then you die. You start a journey that will not end as you expect. From a childhood spent in ditches to a lonesome wait in a ditch. You think you understand. You have relationships with people, animals, possessions and places but you can only guess at the other side. You are aware. You have a moral code you live by. You see how good things could be and, when you wear your Sunday best, you do your bit to make it happen. Your life is measured in seconds but how much of it has significance? You laugh and enjoy. You think and wonder. You create and destroy. Sometimes you are fulfilled and often you are frustrated; most of the time you are simply bored or engaged in the mundane. The things that stand out are oases in a desert of forgotten ordinariness.
This is a story of a crash.

Reflections from a ditch eBook : Goodwin, Opher: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

Traumas

Traumas

The traumas of the past

                                                                Embed themselves

                                                                                                                                Deep inside.

And fester.

An acid

                In the mind,

                                That erodes

                                                All that is good.

At times forgotten

                But merely lying dormant

                                To rise

                                                Ever larger

                                                                Until

                                                                                It swamps

                                                                                                The psyche

                                                                                                                And perverts

                                                                                                                                The being;

The core of all time.

The traumas of the past

                Rise

                                Like grotesque monsters

                                                Escaping

                                                                From the

                                                                                Clammy, Claustrophobic clutches

                                                                                                Of a deep internal tomb.

                                                                                                                To strangle

                                                                                                                                The life

Out of the present.

No trauma is ever healed.

Opher – 28.12.2024

In my experience I see the damage done.

We think we are resilient but we aren’t. The human mind is a delicate machine. Our minds are complex and susceptible to harm. Once damaged they never heal. We can never unsee, unfeel or forget.

The damage may lie dormant in the subconscious but it festers and works away at our sanity.

Every betrayal, every abandonment, every injury and pain is stored up and presents itself in hurt, in protective behaviour, in withdrawal and psychosis.

It’s not just the major things, the PTSD, the major breakdowns, even the lesser stuff throws us off kilter.

The bullied bully. The hurt hurt. The abandoned always leave. The unloved cannot love. The damaged damage.

The world runs on fear and hate. Politicians stoke it.

The world runs on pain.

Just imagine if we could heal all those damaged minds and run the world on love and compassion?

All animals have feelings

People hunt, kill and torture animals with thought. Yet all those who have pets know that all animals are capable of great emotion, they have feelings. They feel pain, they love, they wonder.