The Ghislaine Maxwell Interview Tapes

in July 2025, in an attempt to put the Epstein saga to bed, Donald Trump sent Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche, who had previously served as Donald Trump’s personal defense attorney, to interview Ghislaine Maxwell.

This is how I imagine that interview went. All pure fiction obviously. Satire can be fun:

Miss Maxwell can I start by informing you that you have complete immunity for this interview – unless you lie!

So tell me Ghislaine did Donald Trump involved with Epstein’s child sex ring?

Oh yes. Jeffrey had film of him raping young girls. He’s everywhere on the client list. Jeffery used to blackmail everyone.

Can I remind you that you are sixty-three years old and currently serving a twenty year sentence. I trust Florida is treating you well?

It’s a pigsty.

No doubt. There are better facilities.

OK. What’s the deal?

There is no deal.

Oh come on you haven’t come all this way for nothing. They’ve got him by the balls. I want a full pardon.

That is completely out of the question. It would look as if we bribed you. Nobody would believe what you said.

OK. I can see that. Move me to a nicer place and organise a – pardon a little down the road.

Can I remind you that you have been sentenced for sex trafficking young girls and aiding and abetting Jeffery Epstein in the rape of underage girls and procuring for a sex ring.

And can I remind you that Trump is implicated up to his neck and is running so scared he sent you here. Move me to a nicer place and organise a – pardon a little down the road.

OK. If you play ball, with careful preparation we might be able to arrange that.

No might be. I want assurance.

OK – you got it.

Right. I saw Bill Clinton…

Hold it there. If you implicate Bill Clinton and not Trump that looks fishy.

Got it. There is no client list and I never witnessed the President in any inappropriate setting in any way. The President was never inappropriate with anybody. In the times that I was with him, he was a gentleman in all respects.

Perfect!

Following the interview, on August 1st, Ghislaine Maxwell was transferred to Federal Prison Camp Bryan in Bryan, Texas. This is a minimum-security facility known for housing non-violent offenders and offering relatively relaxed conditions compared to higher-security prisons.

Trump not guilty!

It seems that Trump is not guilty!

Following a visit from Trump’s people Ghislaine Maxwell says that although Trump was very friendly with Epstein and round at his paedophile sex ring on a regular basis she never saw him do anything inappropriate! (Neither did she see Clinton up to no good!)

A herd of elephants just flew overhead!

One wonders what the attraction was of frequently going to parties hosted by his good friend paedophile Jeffry Epstein and procurer and participant Ghislaine Maxwell with hordes of young girls imported specially? Perhaps Trump and Clinton just liked the disco dancing?

Oh – there goes another herd of airborne giraffe!

Having exonerated Trump from all allegations of raping underage girls Ghislaine was immediately removed to a much more pleasant prison to see out her days until she receives her pardon in more comfortable surrounds.

So, we must conclude from this that there is no client list, no tapes of Trump raping young girls and no paedophile behaviour by Trump at all. Matter closed!

That was unexpected wasn’t it?

Oh – now a herd of bison are flying past!

Whatever next!

Trump and Epstein – Will we ever know what happened?

Trump partied with Epstein. Were young girls involved? Is he a paedophile? Is anybody investigating?

Ghislaine Maxwell, who was jailed for procuring young underage girls for Epstein and others to rape, says she is going to spill the beans on Trump. We’ll see. Perhaps we will get to see him locked up after all?