I’ve just joined the Tory Party!!

I’ve told them I’m a VIP! I can do oodles of PPE at a very reasonable price!! It seems that’s all you need to say. I wonder if they put the cash straight into your bank or send a cheque??

It’s only £27 million. I mean, that’s peanuts compared to the amount they doshed out!

I hope I’m not too late!

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