The Antitheist’s Dictionary – Extract 6

Antitheist’s Dictionary: Goodwin, Opher: 9798389994171: Books

Humour and sacrilege.


Christmas was stolen from the pagans. Surely that goes against the Ten Commandments? Christians should feel ashamed and give it back. They keep doing this – nicking stuff out of other people’s fantasies. They’ve done it with Easter and floods, plagues and even Eden.

Christmas is the pagan mid winter solstice tarted up in christian clothing.They’ve taken the whole shhmoodle from the old religion:

Santa Claus in his red and white Amanita muscaria mushroom clothing is the shaman flying through the sky on his sledge. We worship the tree in the house and burn it on the fire for new warmth and light.

It is the big celebration of the start of a new cycle when the days draw out.

I suspect the pagans had a bit more fun though. I bet it wasn’t the odd Christmas card back then. I bet there was a lot of loud music, fucking and drinking going on before the prudish christians put a stop to fun.

I think I would have preferred the old pagan mid-winter solstice celebrations!


 So let’s get this right – the pixie made humans in his exact image? So does the pixie have a foreskin or clitoris? If the Pixie has a foreskin and/or a clitoris why does he now want us to chop ours off? If the pixie hasn’t got a foreskin/clitoris then why have we if we were made in her/his image? Couldn’t he/she have sorted this out in the beginning? It’s not fun having bits of you cut off in order to conform to an image.

The truth of the matter is that this has nothing to do with religion.

Male circumcision was purely tribal. There was a means of recognising people from your tribe.

In war they used to collect the foreskins of fallen warriors as trophies. They couldn’t if they didn’t have one.

Male circumcision is no big deal. It is painful and can lead to nasty infections and complications but not too many. It is just medically unnecessary. Why subject your baby to needless pain and discomfort and a degree of risk? Surely we’ve got beyond tribalism in the civilised world?

Female circumcision on the other hand is barbaric.

There is no excuse for it.

To slice the clitoris and labia off a baby girl with a blunt, rusty razor-blade is the worst sort of child abuse. It is mutilation. There is no religious excuse for such terrible treatment.

To surgically remove it in a hospital theatre with full anaesthetic is almost as bad.

Female genital mutilation stems from the type of misogyny that typified old Middle Eastern tribal cultures (among others). Women were chattels. They were possessions there to be used. You chopped out their sexuality so they could not experience pleasure. You didn’t want to have to spend time having to satisfy a woman’s needs. It was better if she had none. She could be taught how to totally focus on satisfying her man.

People who carry out this child abuse should be locked up for life. They are evil.


The clergy are foot soldiers of the mighty pixie. They go into battle with ordinary folk. Their job is to use whatever means to twist the minds of gullible people into believing.

Some use helping the poor, bereaved or sick – sort of getting to them when they’re vulnerable. Some use hypnotism. They drone on and on until the congregation is mesmerised into a state of quiescent vacancy so that they’ll believe anything as long as it will stop. Others use fire and brimstone to cause a major evacuation of the large intestines. Most aim to implant their evil time-bombs in the brains of young children so that they can never be free to think for themselves ever again – for religious doctrine is like the most addictive crystal meth – once addicted you are an addict for life.


Colossal is a word that means of immense size. It can be deployed to describe the magnificent awesomeness of the universe or to portray the gigantic lie that is at the centre of all religion. There is no evidence of a god, an after-life, or a purpose for existence. To categorically state that there is would be a colossal lie. There is however an immense universe out there. It is awesome.

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